New Jersey: We Got a Situation

In the latest installments of the Carmelo Anthony-to-the-Nets saga, reports have surfaced stating if the New Jersey Nets management doesn't keep their mouths shut then the trade talks will stop, and the Denver Nuggets will pursue  a trade with their Tri-state area rival New York.


Now that's a situation.


The first rule when you're in the Garden State is never threaten your Jersey Shore house-mates, I mean N.B.A. franchises. Do you think telling the Nets' multi-trillionaire owner Mikhail Prokhorov to keep quiet or else will go over well with the Russian? Haven't you seen Rocky IV? Please.

NJ.com

The Nets are the second greatest thing in the state of New Jersey next to the shredded mid-section of Mike "The Situation." They will not be told what to do or what not to do. If they want to talk about a potential Melo blockbuster, they will. If they want to re-acquire Vince Carter from the Phoenix Suns, they will. If they want to change the name of their franchise to the Brooklyn New Yorkers, well, you know.


Regardless of how absurd the Nets' notion of how prominent they view themselves is, their relentless pursue to instate Anthony as the centerpiece of the team for years to come is simply unexplainable. It's more selfish than Vinny smooching with Snooki and then hooking up with her best friend Ryder in Season 2. It's more ridiculous than Sammi and Ronnie seizing the upstairs bedrooms and The Situation having to take on the role as the third wheel. For goodness sake, it's more senseless than the newest member of the crew Deena stripping down to nothing but a cowboy hat on her first night at the house.


That's why the Nets could never be  a member of M.V.P. (Mike, Vinny, Pauly D). They have no sense of planning head, working together or dodging grenades. They wouldn't last a single day doing a classic G.T.L. And this is why...


In examining the trade, here are the potential acquisitions, according to Adrian Wojnarowski of Yahoo! Sports.

Aside from dropping the contracts of Johan Petro and Troy Murphy, the Nets are willing to part ways with Devin Harris, the main acquisition in the Jason Kidd-to-Dallas deal a few years ago, their big free agent signing during the strike out of an off-season Anthony Morrow and third overall draftee Derrick Favors, considered the top power forward in the most recent N.B.A. Draft.

That leaves Brooke Lopez and some cat named Kris Humphries on the team. Well, at least Kim Kardashian will still be a fan.

Essentially, the Nets are trading away half of their roster for a super-stud who does not want to be confined to the swamps of Jersey. The point guard of the future; gone. The power forward to build around; gone. Any chances of rounding out an adequate starting five; gone.

And any chances of adding more first-rounders -- of course, in like 2015.

There's rumors that Prokhorov and minority owner Jay-Z are confident that if they can trade for Melo, they can meet with him and convince him that being a Net (or a New Yorker, ironically) is ideal for his future in The Association.

KimKardashianVideo.org

Interesting.

Given Melo's long-time interest in joining the Knicks across town, it's hard to sell a team that has 10 wins gives him a better chance to win a championship than the No. 6 seed in the Eastern Conference, and of course combine for yet another Big Three. 

Not only that, but I'm sure Anthony sees the Blue and Orange is a far superior team. Both the Knicks and Nets have some of the top Jewish ballers in the league, no disrespect to Omar Cassipi. But are you really going to pick Jordan Farmar over Amar'e Stoudemire?

By heading to Jersey, he's assuming the responsibility of revitalizing an entire franchise. In the Big Apple he's taking the place of Danilo Gallinari. And while no one wants to live up to the reputation of the Italian Stallion, I'm confident Melo is willing to take a stab at it.

And once again, going to Jersey immediately causes a situation. You've seen how quickly Angelina fell from grace at The Shore -- same goes for Sammi now. You don't want the league to suffer if Nets fans do the same with Anthony; do you?

samspiegs@aol.com

Twitter: @samspiegs

Ravens Harbaugh Talks Chiefs, Joe Flacco and Breaking Ben Roethlisberger's Nose

Ravens Head Coach John Harbaugh covers it all during his weekly press conference, from the short week to winning the time of possession battle, including a comparison of his quarterback to Big Ben (Sam Spiegelman/Baltimore Sun).


 

Thank God For NBA All-Star Game Voting

The latest N.B.A. All-Star voting  projects the following the starting five: Rajon Rondo, Kevin Garnett, LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and Dwight Howard for the Eastern Conference, against Kobe Bryant, Chris Paul, Kevin Durant, Carmelo Anthony and Yao Ming for the West.


Once again, the fans got it right.


There was no chance to oust Wade or King James from the top five in voting, both are in the top three in scoring on the most profiled team in the N.B.A. Meanwhile, Howard is tops in rebounding and Rondo leads the ways in assists. 


In the Wild Wild West, Bryant is well established in his starting guard role. Paul is enjoying the best defensive year with 25 more steals than the closest player, Monta Ellis. Then factor in that Durant is looking for a second consecutive scoring title at nearly 28 points per game, and Melo stands fourth in that same race. 


So what's the big fuss? Eight out of the top 10 players seem to have earned their spot in the big game in Los Angeles come February 21. The fans clearly know what's going on and who is deserving -- right?


Yeah they know who is leading in these statistical categories, but let me hit you with the "but." Notice who these players are -- Celtics, Heat and Lakers, with the overwhelming star power of Melo, Howard and CPIII. 


Can the little guys, (not in height, but name), get some love?


Not to overwhelm anybody with statistics, because numbers are just numbers in many cases, but look at some of the ballers on the outside looking in that are getting overlooked:

• Right behind Superman in the East, Al Horford has 18 double-doubles this season. The top five is rounded out behind his Hawks teammate Josh Smith, better known as J-Smooth, as well as N.Y. Knicks Amar'e Stoudemire and Raymond Felton.
  
• In that same category in the Western Conference, none of the top six are top vote-getters. Kevin Love is the league's leader by a distance 31 double-doubles, averaging 21 points and almost 16 boards a night. That's ridic.
  
• Blake Griffin, Pau Gasol, Zach Randolph, and Steve Nash follow Love in double-doubles. That's right -- a Clipper and Grizzlie are second and third, behind a first place Timberwolve, or Timberwolf? Well, at least no one is picking favorites.
  
• King James, better known as the Jester in Cleveland, is the most well-rounded player in the East in terms of points, rebounds and dimes. In the West, it's Love and Griffin No. 1 and 2 in that rank -- Love's average is actually better than LeBron's.
  
• And how about giving some boring teams some credit? Not actually boring, but considered dull to a national audience because of their superb fundamentals. Manu Ginobili and Richard Jefferson of the San Antonio Spurs, owners of the best record in the N.B.A., and Houston's Kevin Martin are second, third and fourth in three-pointers made this year. In the lead is Golden State Warriors' Dorell Wright, but I'm sure nobody outside of Lawrence or Oakland has even heard of that cat.

Not included in my stats were Stat and Felton, who people refuse to pay attention to because they do not believe in the Knicks. Stoudemire is second only to Durant in scoring in the league by just over a point, and almost single handedly has turned the Knicks from a conference bottom-dweller to a contender.

I say "almost single handedly" because of the other free agent acquisition N.Y. got this summer -- their new point guard. Felton is second only to Rondon is assists this season, who deservingly is the No. 1 vote-getter in All-Star votes. Yet Felton's 15 double-doubles rank first among Eastern Conference point guards. Take that, haters.

In the East, the blunder that stands out the most is The Big Ticket starting at forward. For one, he's injured, and if he's healthy come February's end you know his elderly legs will not allow him to play for more than the opening five minutes. 

I'm not saying Garnett's season -- 15 ppg and 9.5 rpg -- is not worthy of All-Star honors. Because this cat plays in Boston though, he is stealing the vote of obnoxious, ignoring Celtics fans that fail to realize there are lesser names elsewhere that are more deserving of the vote.

Garnett is a 13-time All-Star -- do you think he really cares at this point in his career? He'd prefer to get his mid-day nap and the early bird dinner special somewhere in Cambridge, Mass. than suit up for another All-Star shootout. 

In his place: 1. Amar'e Stoudemire 2. Josh Smith 3. Danny Granger

Getting to the West, listen to this bone I need to pick: Are fans just messing around by actually voting Yao Ming in at center for the game? Dude's been eating fried chicken and pounding brews for the last few months. Is Allen Iverson getting the nod, too?

Seriously...is China going bazerk on their Sony's and Toshiba's voting for their hometown boy? I understand the logic behind it, but they need to tune in at 4 a.m. or whatever time it is over their in Beijing and realize Yao isn't on the hardwood anymore. 

What's problematic in this situation is there is a scarcity of quality big men in the Western Conference. Sure, the East has Howard and Stoudemire, but the West is limited to a handful of true centers and a lot power forwards posing in that role.

Aside from abolishing Yao's eligibility to even play in the All-Star Game, open up the slot for the fans to vote for either a center or even a power forward into the starting five. 

Listen -- Yao would love nothing more than to enjoy his K.F.C. and Natty Light's and watch another cat take his spot in the game. 

In his place: 1. Kevin Love 2. Pau Gasol 3. Al Jefferson 

Harbaugh to Dolphins, Still Plans to Draft Luck

Did you think Jim Harbaugh would take his talents to the National Football League without his partner in crime Andrew Luck? Odds are you're wrong.


The highly tauted Harbaugh accepted the head coaching position with the Miami Dolphins today knowingly that this team puts him in the best position to select his former quarterback in the 2012 N.F.L. Draft. He noted all the weapons the team had in place was the right formula to completely fail in his first season in South Beach.


"What we have in [quarterback] Chad Henne -- I think we're going in the right direction," Harbaugh said in during his introductory press conference. "Between [Henne], all of our running backs planning to flee in free agency and the most under-performing wide receiving core in the league -- you can't pass that up. I'd be shocked if we scored seven points all year."


The 'Fins already set an impressive precedent with the 30th best scoring offense, better than all but two teams. When informed of the statistic, Harbaugh simply replied "Damn," adding, "That'll be tough to top."


Rumors swirled that both the San Francisco 49ers and the Denver Broncos also had interest in Harbaugh joining their respective staffs. 


In the Bay Area, the prospect of coaching a bruising back in Frank Gore and talented receivers in Michael Crabtree, Josh Morgan and Vernon Davis proved to be too dangerous, according to those close to Harbaugh. Perhaps the offensive potential would solidify a mid-range draft pick, and even a playoff berth given the division. 


Despite Tim Tebow's presence in the Mile High city, the Broncos also were too risky of a team for Harbaugh to take a chance on. The roster featured the N.F.L.'s leading wide receiver, the always reliable Brandon Lloyd, and third-year bust Knowshon Moreno, who is living up to his first-round potential. Combine that with two young, talented wideouts in Demaryius Thomas and Eric Decker, who took Denver by storm with breakout rookie campaigns.


"That was something I considered, but I swear that's better than [Brian] Hartline," Harbaugh said.


Harbaugh opted for Miami after Luck announced his decision to remain at Stanford in order to finish out collegiate career and earn his degree in architecture. N.F.L. draft experts already have declared Luck the consensus No. 1 pick in next year's draft.


There is speculation, however, that the N.F.L. and the Dolphins have another challenger for compete Luck's talents in 2012. No, I am not talking about the Carolina Panthers who will be forced to ultimately start Jimmy Clausen in the coming season, or even Tennessee who has faith that Rusty Smith gives them the best option to win. In fact, neither of these teams who will rival the Dolphins 2011 aim for a winless season are the threat.


"The Home Depot is proud to announce that we will be involved in the Andrew Luck sweepstakes next spring when the talented builder gradates from Stanford," according to the press release the company made public late last evening."


"We are in the business of looking for the best builders in the nation. Luck has demonstrated he is a hard worker and has obviously shown he is passionate about the profession by electing to stay in school for another year. Luck brings exactly what we are looking for in our employees -- strength, delivery and strong vision to find customers in need."


The report also stated Luck's versatility on the field could easily translate into an employee in the aisles and at the register.


Harbaugh and co. cannot do much about the juggernaut The Depot vying for Luck's services, but has assured he will sure his Miami Dolphins will play to their unyielding potential. To this point, he has already anointed Henne a starter, letting everyone in South Beach he is all about business.






This article is satire. All quotes, sources and content are not real.

Baltimore Ravens Speak About NFL Playoffs, Kansas City Chiefs and the future of Jim Harbaugh

Ray Rice discusses his emerging role as a leader on the team, as well as a conversation with Ed Reed vs. the Bengals. He also discusses his first go-around in the playoffs.


 


Ravens cornerback Chris Carr discusses the team's expectations heading into the playoffs, defending wide receiver Dwayne Bowe and the Kansas City Chiefs offense and the chemistry of the Ravens' secondary



 




John Harbaugh discusses the veteran leadership on his team, the progress of playoff foe Kansas City and on his brother Jim Harbaugh's Orange Bowl victory


 

Terps Fans React to Randy Edsall Hiring as Maryland Football Head Coach

 

Terps React to Randy Edsall Hire as Head Coach

It wasn't Mike Leach. It wasn't Gus Malzahn. And to the dismay of the fans up in Ann Arbor, it wasn't even Rich Rodriguez. 


On Sunday, it was announced that Randy Edsall, the head coach of the Connecticut Huskies for the past 12 years, would assume the same position with the Maryland Terrapins. 


The vacancy at Maryland came after Athletic Director Kevin Anderson decided to buy out the remainder of Ralph Friedgen's contract, a move that was imminent after former offensive coordinator and coach-in-waiting James Franklin left to become the head coach at Vanderbilt. 


Perhaps no name was more linked to the Maryland gig than former Texas Tech coach Mike Leach, largely due to the ties he has to former Terp and Under Armour founder Kevin Plank. Leach interviewed this week for the position, and it reportedly went well. 


The other candidate was Auburn offensive coordinator Guz Malzahn, who also interviewed for the job this week. Malzahn became a hot commodity on the coaching market for his work this year with Heisman Trophy winner Cam Newton, and was offered the head coaching job at Vanderbilt. 


Both Leach and Malzahn were considered favorites for the position based on what they could bring to the table. They are both offensive-minded coaches who could change the dynamic of the Terps offense. And if Anderson wanted to energize the fan base, he would have went in that direction. 


Instead, Anderson opted for a coach who turned UConn into a force in the Big East, capturing two conference championships in seven years since its inauguration. Most recently, Edsall's Huskies appeared in the Tostitos BCS Fiesta Bowl, losing convincingly at the hands of the Sooners. 


On Twitter today, there was a tremendous amount of backlash about the Edsall hire. Fans said he was not the flashy hire they expected the university to mark, nor did they consider it an upgrade over Friedgen. In fact, there were many who called for Friedgen to retain his job...as if.


One tweet that struck me was along the lines of 'Leach, Malzahn or fail" for Anderson. If we are going by those lines, consider this the ultimate blunder.


The Terps players, on the other hand, have shown a more optimistic approach to the hire. Here were some of the Tweets they sent following a team meeting called by Anderson tonight.

There was one plea, by Maryland cornerback Cameron Chism, that echoed many of the cries from Terp Nation -- to keep defensive coordinator Don Brown as defensive coordinator. Brown was the director behind the defense's turnaround, which he said all came together in his second season in College Park.

The other Tweet that struck was that of quarterback Danny O'Brien, the ACC's Rookie of the Year and the centerpiece of the Maryland offense for the next few years. O'Brien was rumored to be considering transferring to Vanderbilt after Friedgen's contract was bought out, and many thought his relationship with Franklin would help lure his talents to Knoxville.

And O'Brien is right. Despite the disappointment scattered throughout Terp Nation on this Sunday, it would be stupid to simply stop supporting the team. 

Edsall was not the guy we expected to become the head coach, nor was he the guy we wanted to be the head coach -- for the most part. But he is here, and if they players accept him then the fans should back him...if, of course, they want a successful football team.